


Candle Fic

by Brenny Urie (ConvenienceStoreMusical)



Series: Domestic Bandom AU [1]
Category: Fall Out Boy, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M, Parody, bath and bodyworks, suburban white mom au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-13
Updated: 2015-01-13
Packaged: 2018-03-07 11:57:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3173156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConvenienceStoreMusical/pseuds/Brenny%20Urie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Brendon and Patrick want to do is liven up their home -and their romance- with some candles. However, an unexpected enemy gets in their way. Can the lovers prevail in this trying time?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Candle Fic

"Trick did you call the store in Appleton yet? You know it's the last day of the sale."

"Hold on Brenny, I have to finish up with the store in Middleton... oh I guess they don't have either of the new ones either." Brendon groaned at the news and sprawled out on the couch. There was no way the two of them were going to pay full retail for those candles, even if Bath and Body Works made the most delightful scents. Knowing they had two more Peach Bellini candles only comforted him some.

Patrick came into the livingroom, settling himself in the chair by the couch.  
"I don't think we're going to be able to get this candles," he said dubiously.

"Man, those are going to be the best candles though. How do you get a better scent than Iced Gingerbread? If we don't get them now we'll have to wait for Black Friday and we already agreed we were going to TJ Maxx then to pick up our last Christmas gifts," Brendon complained.

"We could probably just double up on coupons-" 

"You can't double coupons at the Bath and Body Works." 

Patrick sighed, looking wistfully at the clock. It was about time for the Packers game to be on and neither of them could miss that. Not when they were playing against the Bears.

"Let me try Appleton again, then we'll just call it a day and watch the football game, right?" Patrick nudged Brendon. Brendon sighed in slight exasperation, but shifted to sit back on the couch. Patrick smiled, getting up to move to the kitchen to try contacting the Appleton store once again.

Brendon turned on the television and flipped to ESPN. Two anchormen were on the pregame show, discussing how challenging the upcoming game would be. It was at least a half hour before the game began. 

Feeling hopeless, Brendon tried concentrating on the program. One of them started to go through the Bears line-up and the stats just before Patrick called from the kitchen.  
"Brenny! They've got them!" 

"No way, they do?!" Brendon immediately shot up from where he was sitting on the couch. Patrick came to the doorway, holding the phone to the palm of his hand.

"Yeah man they've got the WinterCandy Apple and the Iced Gingerbread on an off-site store," Patrick said giddily.

"Dude tell them we'll trade in two Peach Bellinis for them."

"What about the game?"

"I'll record it on the DVR just tell them we need those candles!"

Brendon left the livingroom to retrieve the extra Peach Bellini candles from the bedroom. When he came back, Patrick was already putting on a sweatshirt.

"I told them we were coming from Oshkosh so it should take us like, 40 minutes to get there. The lady on the phone said the Winter Candy Apple and Iced Gingerbread should be there by then," he explained. 

"Do we need to get anything else while we're out? Might as well get other stuff since we're out in Appleton," Brendon said. He set down the Peach Bellinis to put on a sweatshirt as well. Wisconsin was unbearably chilly this time of year.

"Oh dude, I just remembered. I put one of Andy's gifts on layaway at the Rent-A-Center, we should stop by there so I can pick it up and pay it all off."

Brendon, now dressed to brave the Wisconsin autumn, gathered up his Peach Bellinis and the two men left the house to drive to Appleton.

After Brendon and Patrick left the house, they got into their pristine white SUV and drove all the way to Appleton. The two of them chatted idly and happily about the upcoming holiday season. Brendan especially kept an eye on the time as minutes started ticking down. He was almost vibrating with excitement for his yuletide scented candles.

Completing their stop to the Rent-A-Center and now with a mystery gift in tow to their good friend, the men drove to the Bath and Body Works. Brendan, who was driving, became almost too excited and swung into two parking spots on accident. Surely no one would mind- the parking lot was nearly empty after all. Everyone was at home watching the Packers game of course!

Brendon fled from the white SUV with Patrick close behind. Eagerly the two of them entered the Bath and Body Works. Pleasant and notably festive scents enraptured the two upon their arrival.

"Brenny, I'm going to look around for a bit- you should go see if the lady's got your candles ok?" Patrick said.  
"Alright!" Brendon said, gripping onto his Peach Bellini candles tightly. The two departed for the moment with Patrick delving into the aromatic wilds of the store. Brendon steered himself to the nearest check-out counter where a cashier was awaiting the next customer.

"Hiya! Welcome to Bath and Bodyworks! How can I help you today?" the perky young cashier asked. The tag on her shirt read "Ellie", which Brendon took notice of. He was sensitive like that. Wisconsinites were raised with such manners.

"Hiiiii Ellie. Actually I just called in earlier about a WinterCandy Apple and Iced Gingerbread? Someone said they were bringing it in from an off-site store." Brendon explained.  
"Oh um... I don't know anything about that! Let me go check with my manager, ok? He'll be out here in a minute." Ellie left the counter.

Brendon tenderly placed his Peach Bellinis on the counter, still excited despite this slight delay. His candles were soon at hand. The house was certainly going to be festive this year for sure!

Brendon spent a few minutes rummaging through the lipgloss on the counter before Ellie returned. A man, presumably the manager, had also accompanied her. His name tag read "Pete W., Manager". Brendon almost swooned from the beautiful lavender colour in his hair as well as how toned he was. Thank goodness he was a man on a mission today.

"You called about the candles right? It turns out that no one's been able to pick them up yet, sorry." Brendon was taken aback. He took a quick look around the store- Patrick was over by the lotions, trying on them all. A few grandmothers were there buying up every dogwood perfume bottle available. But the store was empty otherwise. Of course- everyone was at home, watching the Packers game.

Well, it doesn't look like anyone's really here right now..." Brendon said warily. He protectively held his Peach Bellini candles. Pete W. seemed to have noticed this as well as Brendon pointed out the emptiness.

"Right, right. Tell you what. I'll send Ellie out to the off-site store, and she'll pick up your candles!" the manager said. Brendon became less tense at this news.

"I'll be back as soon as I can, sir!" Ellie said to Brendon. She waved good-bye enthusiastically and left the counter one again, this time heading for the doors.

"Is there anything else I can help you with today?" Pete W. asked.

"No I'll just wait, thank you," Brendon said. He was slightly ticked off but at least Patrick had set the DVR for the game. Brendon gathered up his Peach Bellinis and left the counter, returning to his beloved partner in the lotion aisle.

"Did you get your candles yet?" Patrick asked. He had his sleeves rolled up, and was squirting a sample of Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin scented lotion onto his hands. Other sample bottles were open as well and if Brendon really wanted to, he could probably sniff them all out. But he wasn't going to. Not in the Bath and Body Works.

"No..." Brendon said dejectedly. "They didn't even bring them in yet. They're going to get them though."  
"Aw man. At least we can kill some time here, right? Here try this Vanilla Bean Noel and tell me if its better than Warm Vanilla Sugar." Patrick happily handed Brendon the two colourful and vanilla themed lotion samples. The other man sighed contentedly, setting down his candles in order to indulge his significant other.

Brendon and Patrick spent half an hour trying on every lotion. While Brendon stuck to scents of the fruity variety, Patrick went all out and sampled all indiscriminately. When he ran out of room on his arms, Patrick moved onto his face. His left cheek now smelled of Japanese Cherry Blossom and his right smelled of A Thousand Wishes. Brendon wrinkled his nose when planting a smooch on Patrick's forehead, the smells intertwining unpleasantly. The things he did to show affection.

The front doors opened and Brendon caught what looked like Ellie in his peripheral vision moving back to the counter. As he turned he found he was correct.

"Patrick get your lotions and let's go, the cashier's back!" Brendon said exuberantly. He gathered up his precious Peach Bellini candles as Patrick loaded up on several lotions. They then both returned to the counter where Ellie and Pete W. were.

"Soooooo bad news guys," Ellie said as the men approached. She was crestfallen. "It tuuuurns out they didn't have any at the off-site store. Someone snagged them a day ago and no one updated the stock list."  
"If you want-" Pete began, but was interrupted by Brendon forcefully setting his candles on the counter.

"Listen here, Peter," Brendon snapped. "I did not drive all the way to Appleton just to lose out on my candles. Do you know how far I drove?? 40 minutes, 40 whole minutes. The Packers game is on, I could've been home cheering for our home team. But no. Here I am in Appleton, without my candles and without my dignity!"

"Sir we can still trade in your Peach Bellinis if you want," Pete W. said somewhat ticked off. "There's no reason to raise such a big fuss." "You're kidding me right? No, no, no. I was promised my candles and I have been put out of my way to get them. I've been calling every single store and you were supposed to have them!" Brendon huffed angrily, staring at Pete W. expectantly.

"You know, I deserve something for my time here. I have carted myself and my boyfriend out all the way to Appleton for these candles. I don't care if it's a receipt or a free candle or something but-" "I can get you some coupons," Ellie piped up. "ELLIE. I ALREADY HAVE ALL THE COUPONS FROM BATH AND BODY WORKS. I HAVE TEN EACH. I DON'T NEED ANYMORE COUPONS."

"Well..... we have a hotline where you can call a live person to help. We really can't do any more here, sir." Pete said weakly. Brendon slammed his fists onto the counter angrily. "A live person?! WHO DO YOU THINK I'M TALKING TO?!" Patrick gently placed his hand on Brendon's arm in concern. Brendon took back his Peach Bellinis, hugging them tightly to his chest. "You know what Peter?! I'm going to call your district manager. I'm going to call them right up and tell them how you mistreated me. You better pray you don't get fired!" Brandon turned abruptly and stormed out of the store. Patrick tailed closely behind, abandoning his lotions as his boyfriend was leaving.

"Brenny!! Brennnny! Wait up!" Brendon was leagues ahead of Patrick, halfway to the pristine white SUV by the time Patrick had gotten sight of him. It wasn't long before Brendon jerked the car doors open and hastily got into the driver's seat. He then set the candles on the floor carefully- even his anger could not cause him to potentially harm his candles.

Brendon folded his hands into his lap, beginning to shake. He has NEVER been this poorly treated in his life. Brendon could nearly cry from this outright abuse. Patrick timidly entered the car from the passenger's side. He placed a hand on Brendon's shoulder. "You okay?"

"N-no..." Oh great, his voice was cracking. Patrick moved his hand to rub Brendon's back. Both of them sat in silence for a while as Brendon tried to calm down. Soon Brendon heaved a sigh, using his sweatshirt sleeve to wipe the burgeoning tears from the corners of his eyes.

"I'm good, I'm good." 

"So.... are you really going to call the district manager? We can do it after we catch up on the game if you want," Patrick offered. Brendon rested his hands on the steering wheel, looking out the windshield to the looming Bath and Bodyworks store ahead.

"No... I have a better idea. I'm going to call them up... and make a customer service review on Youtube." Patrick gasped at his boyfriend's vindictive statement.

"Are you sure, Brenny?"

"It's the only way Trick.... it's the only way to let people know about the tragedy that happened here today."

Patrick nodded quietly, withdrawing his hand to buckle his seatbelt. Brendon followed suit, and soon the car roared to life, taking the couple home.

**Author's Note:**

> Can you believe this is 2000+ words? I certainly can't.


End file.
